5 Changes I Made in My Life

Welcome to Letters of Wonder, where I explore the truths behind clarity, creation, and a wonderful life.

I want to break down the life habits that helped me scale a business, get more fit and have more peace/freedom.

But I want to do it differently.

I'm not just going to tell you what worked.

I'm going deeper to show you exactly why these worked—because that's the part you usually never hear.

These are all directly from my experience.

1) Lean into the hard stuff

This one probably changed my life the most.

Replacing bad habits with good ones is really hard—but it must be done.

Three major things happen when you take the easy route (aka the worse habits):

1. How others see you
People treat you differently depending on your habits. It's the harsh truth. If you have poor habits or don't work on yourself, others subconsciously judge you for it. This may not matter to you, but it ate at me when I felt this way.

2. Your identity
When you fail to follow through on promises to yourself, your self-image gets worse. You start seeing yourself as someone who never achieves anything. It becomes a loop. Others reinforce it and you reinforce it to yourself. When your identity is low, opportunities stop coming your way. And it’s not because of whatever poor trait you have, but because your subconscious mind just doesn’t believe you deserve them.

3. Your quality of life
Good habits compound. And the cool thing for our generation is that we have so much research to show this. Ask ai about what you can learn from generations of people before us and it will tell you exactly what you need. We know all the things that dramatically reduce the quality of our lives. We also know all the basic things we can do to make life amazing. Things like eating healthy, lifting, avoiding substances etc. Just by doing more of the good, our life becomes so much more vibrant.

So how do you actually start replacing your bad habits?

Here’s how it worked for me:

• Slowly remove the bad habit.

• Gradually replace it with something better.

• Create a clear system so the new habit sticks around.

For example, I used to be extremely messy. All my friends know this.

It was so bad that my binders were crammed with papers (yep, I didn’t even use the hooks).

So I wanted to make a change in my life.

On my work desk, I stopped throwing papers around (stopping the bad habit).

It was hard, but I just made a conscious effort to put the papers in my shelf instead (in a badly organized way, but better than being on my desk).

Then I slowly organized the papers in the shelf.

Eventually, I created a system so that I knew exactly where to store papers and my room has been clean ever since.

This applies in other areas of life too.

It wasn’t easy to have a fully dialed in diet/workout system while building a business.

But I made the slow changes with the system above.

And slowly the changes starting compounding.

And as a bonus my identity shifted too.

You just become way more confident, trust yourself more, and opportunities naturally start coming your way because people can see that.

2) Knowing where to become more vulnerable

For a really long time, I had a deep fear of being seen as an imposter.

I knew I wanted to be an entrepreneur, but I had no idea what I was doing.

And I knew I sucked. So instead of asking for people ahead of me for advice and being open to feedback, I'd pretend to know everything.

In other words, I acted like I knew exactly what I was doing (I had no idea).

The problem was, this only pushed away the right people and opportunities.

Because they could see right through it.

And slowly I realized that I wasn't fooling anyone except myself.

Eventually, I started admitting mistakes and openly sharing what I didn’t know.

I began to ask people where I could improve and tried to actively take the advice that felt truthful to me.

The key here was to ask the people who were truly where I wanted to be (there were a lot of free advice-givers who hadn’t done anything themselves).

And to even get in touch with the right people, I had to be very open about my situation and what I wanted to learn (and no, this doesn’t mean to ask for free-handouts).

This felt uncomfortable at first—but soon enough, I noticed people wanted to help me.

And that’s when the mentors showed up and more opportunities started coming.

People saw I was just a normal person figuring things out, exactly like them.

Nobody has it all figured out.

I'm still learning, and I still sometimes feel like an imposter—but now, I try my best to not hide it.

3) Focusing attention on specific things

Where your attention goes, your energy flows.

Okay yes, it sounds a bit cliché—but what does it really mean?

It means whatever you consistently focus on determines how you feel.

And this was a huge one I ignored (even though I heard this quote so many times).

I don’t know why I ignored it, because it made such a change in my life when I actually applied it.

If you spend your day watching negative news, your mindset becomes negative.

If you scroll brainrot TikToks all day, life becomes like brainrot too, and you stop taking things seriously.

I know because I did both the things above for a long time.

Until I realized one day - what the heck am I doing with my time and energy?

And that’s when I started working backwards.

I began experimenting to see what would lead to the most peaceful and high energy days.

And what I noticed was interesting.

The best days all had the following:

• Moving my body (lifting and sauna for me)

• Eating healthy (cooking whole-foods)

• Sleeping/waking up early (and not checking my phone during these times)

• Reading, meditating, writing (to learn + observe + reflect)

• Doing deep work for hours (creative work that makes me get into flow)

• Quality time (great conversations with people)

• Spending time in nature (in silence)

I know, it sounds like a lot. These are what work for me.

And as a fellow human, I can suggest that most (if not all) of these can work for you too.

It’s also interesting to note that super successful/happy (success is not only money) people protect their energy carefully.

It's not because they're boring; they're just super aware of where their energy goes.

Think about it, if you had years to brain-rot, be lazy, and feel like crap, would you not want to switch?

I say this because I was that way for a while. And it sucked.

I read in a book called The Power of Unwavering Focus that you should treat energy like money.

Think about it.

You wouldn’t just randomly hand out your money to anyone who asks for it, would you?

You spend it carefully on what truly matters.

Why not do the same thing with your attention and energy?

We measure everything—our weight, our grades, our bank accounts.

Shouldn't we also measure our attention and energy?

4) Do each thing like it's your last time ever doing it

Imagine your next conversation with your mom was the last time you ever got to talk to her.

How different would you be?

Especially if you’ve never acted this way with her.

You’d slow down and tell her how much you love and appreciate everything she’s done.

You’d actually listen and understand her deeply instead of being distracted.

So why wait for a tragedy or the actual "last time" to behave like this?

And it’s not just with your mom.

It could be your friends, your siblings, an activity you love, or even a place you go to often.

By treating every interaction as if it's your last time, you naturally become more present.

And that’s when your real, present self emerges. This self is pretty cool by the way.

Yes, it’s tough to always live like this.

But the more you practice it, the more natural it becomes.

And soon, you won’t even want to go back.

Because everything around us is temporary—including you.

And you really can’t take that for granted.

5) Focus on improving yourself first, then give back

I've seen this clearly in my life:

People are loving at their core.

It’s just a bit hard to always show this love, especially when you feel you’re not “getting” as much as you’re “giving”.

Yet, this feels super transactional.

But it’s just reality.

People will naturally ask, "What's in it for me?".

I mean, don’t you?

If you notice people avoid you or opportunities rarely come your way, flip the question: "What's in it for them?"

Start thinking from the other person's perspective.

Soon you'll realize you need something valuable to offer to others.

And it’s cool because as you work on producing that value for them, you yourself will feel better.

So how do you actually do this?

You have to improve yourself.

You can't fill someone else's cup if your own cup is empty.

It can be to learn new things, make money, develop skills. Whatever it takes to offer value for others.

Ultimately, that’s what money is. You’re just giving value and receiving it.

And this isn’t for the purpose of making more money (although that will happen too).

It’s just about the flow of things.

By becoming better yourself, you're automatically better for everyone around you.

Many people today wonder why they're not treated how they want. I’ve seen this time and time again in my own life.

I faced a lot of challenges with fitting in with certain people.

And many times, it was simply because I didn’t have anything valuable to offer to them.

And so I told myself… do yourself—and everyone else—a favor. And improve yourself.

For me, this meant stopping laziness, cutting wasted time, and committing to learning and understanding people better.

For you, it can mean whatever you choose for it to be. You know what is right and wrong.

You'll quickly notice that as you become better, the world naturally starts fitting you in.

Because now you actually have something valuable to contribute.

You have to give to get.

As harsh as this sounds, don’t worry, it’s not.

Eventually, you realize there’s no giving and getting—just giving.

Giving is getting.

And that’s where true love emerges from.